Science, in keeping with its tradition of confirming things we already knew, now says that staying friends with your ex is a pretty bad idea. Sure, it’s hard to end a relationship and you always want to keep important people in your life. Is it really so wrong?
Well, according to Nina Atwood, a therapist and the author of Temptations of the Single Girl, it’s not wrong, but it is challenging and can leave you in a tough spot emotionally.
“Wanting to be friends keeps you from feeling the full depth of the loss, softening the blow of the breakup,” says Atwood.
“You may feel that this person knows you better than anyone else. Even if you’re not sexually attracted, you may still want the emotional intimacy that you shared.”
But this can make it harder to get past the relationship and the feelings you once had. The dependency isn’t broken and you end up with the same hurt feelings over and over again.According to Juliana Breines, a psychologist, staying friends often results in more hurt feelings, jealousy, and anxiety.
Of course, there’s no one-side-fits-all to human emotions, but according to Lindsay Kriger, a relationship expert, it’s almost impossible to pull off staying friends. Kriger believes it’s best to delete their number, block them on Facebook, and move on.
What do you think? Is it good to stay friends?